If you’re anything like me, you’re probably used to trying to shut the memory down whenever it comes up and quickly distracting yourself from the feelings it provokes. All it takes is asking yourself three questions.įirst, think of the memory you recalled at the beginning of this article. They cringe right along with the people in the stories, and they like the fact that they feel empathy for them.ĭahl realized that we can turn this into a powerful way to cope with our own lingering feelings of embarrassment. Others, however, like reading or hearing about cringeworthy moments because it helps them feel more connected to people.
While exploring various performance events and online groups dedicated to airing people’s awkward moments - sometimes with their participation or permission, sometimes not - Dahl discovered that some people use others’ embarrassing situations to ridicule them and set themselves apart from them. Dahl was curious what this feeling we call “awkwardness” really is, and whether or not there’s anything to be gained from it. Melissa Dahl, a journalist and editor at New York Magazine, researched awkwardness and embarrassment for her book “ Cringeworthy,” which came out last year. This approach is much cheaper and probably less dangerous. No, I haven’t invented a sci-fi memory deletion device. Instead of making you cringe or want to hide under the covers, you’ll just smile or even laugh at it, or at least be at peace with it. Now, imagine if you could disarm this memory. Or the one that makes you want to grab your past self by the shoulders and exclaim, “Why?!” Think of your most embarrassing memory - the one that unwittingly pops into your head when you’re trying to fall asleep or about to head out to a social event.